Since returning to England wife and I have been watching CNN (American) and Bravo imports on Hayu almost exclusively. Like millennials, we don't watch TV as it used to be envisaged. We do not crowd around the telly with mum and gran for Corrie or Eastenders or Holby City or Dancing With the Stars. We do not follow the mad works of Theresa May, Jeremy Corbyn, Bill Brewer, Jan Stewer, and the other people whoever they are. We do not allow the mad works of Theresa May, Jeremy Corbyn, Dan'l Whiddon, Arry Awke and especially Peter Gurney to interfere in our fun.
We illegally streamed CNN America on a channel named after, for reasons that were never clear, the Hulk. One day the Hulk was banished. Did Dr. Strange send him to the crossroads of reality? We scrabbled for replacements. We must watch Don Lemon, Anderson Cooper, Chris Cuomo, Wolf and Kate Bolduan (on maternity leave and with terrible stand-ins) and we resent it when Amanpour or Richard Quest blunder in on our programming as it is on English CNN.
How to describe it when Don Lemon at the height of one of his ecstasies of spleen is interrupted abruptly by the grey monotone of the interloper Amanpour with her piffling stuff from the postcolonial planet. Take me back to Foggy Bottom –– now.
CNN in Britain and Europe is earnestly capitalistic, rubbing its palms over Dubai and Africa and China like dull economics students from public school. How many times have I seen that advert with the rapper from the Middle East. Then the story about the nuns who have "donated their brains to the study of dementia". It shows a nun quipping, "What good is it to do me when my brain is six feet under?"
Don't they believe in the eternal resurrection?
The Europeans at Davos, oblivious, barefacedly greedy, giving Trump a "ow you say, a fair shake of the whip".
All this is preamble to the fact that Mark E. Smith died on Wednesday and I didn't even know about it til today, although I had been keenly following stories such as Trey Gowdy backpedalling over Mueller and the ongoing obscure machinations of Devin Nunes, not to mention the minutiae in the lives of Stassi Shroeder, Scheana Shay and that interesting personage James Kennedy, the "white Kanye".
I phoned up my brother today to say, "Uhhh... whatsitcawled... did you see that Peter Wyngarde died?"
"Yes," he said. "And what about Mark E. Smith?"
"What about Mark E. Smith? How is Mark?" I said, quite oblivious. "I am only interested in Trey Gowdy."
I am only interested in Nikki Haley (AKA "Niki Hoeky")
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6dyo_xZnvsA
Nikki Hokey [sic] swears she isn't having an affair with Trump. Says she's only been on Air Force One the wunst. This sort of rhetorical device –– diversion by employing an ancillary factoid –– is suspicious. It's like Trump saying he didn't have Russian prostitutes urinate on him because he's got a hygiene neurosis.
Nikki Hokey should have said, "What I don't know about this scurrilous ugly rumour is: who is more insulted by the allegation? Who comes off worse in the transaction if I snog the Prez?"
Last observation. Wife and I were watching Chris Cuomo's late night show.
He's on in the morning and he's on late at night.
I said, "When does this guy sleep?"
Does he sleep?
Where do you go to my lovely, when you're alone in your bed?
Forget I said that.
No comments:
Post a Comment